Friday, December 19, 2014

Episode 6x22 "State of the Unions"

There was no commented response to me comparing that guy to Jon Stewart in the last post. I thought that was hilarious. Also, I completely forgot to mention in 6x19 that that episode was directed by Mickey Dolenz. How cool is that? Though I have no idea why he decided to be so involved with this series.


Well we're here. The place where it all goes wrong. Hopefully I can keep from going insane after this point, but you can expect at least one "This is fucking ridiculous" in each of the next five or so reviews.


Topanga finds Cory at Brew Lagoon in The Union with the news of a recently available date at the wedding hall. Cory explains that he's been having more nightmares about marriage, and it's a funny little bit as he explains his most recent one. He adds, though, that it's not enough to dissuade him from getting married so I don't know why he brought it up. Topanga offers no advice or consolation, and just doesn't seem to care at all. Nice.

Cory wonders how she can be so certain and unafraid of getting married, and this is where it all starts to crumble. She says "I just look at our parents, Cory." Yes, Topanga is using the fact that her parents and Cory's parents got married young and remain deeply in love to convince herself that her marriage with Cory will work out. That, instead of, I don't know, how much she loves Cory, or how well they've always gotten along, or that she has faith in their relationship, no no no, that would be silly! Forget that nonsense. They'll be fine because her parents are fine. Who, by the way, are coming into town to discuss the wedding.


Is it weird that she called him "Feeny" in that context? Amy and Alan almost always call him "George".

So Feeny and Bolander are hanging out with Amy and Alan in their kitchen, relaying the news about their upcoming wedding. Amy insists that they have the wedding in her living room, which... um... okay, sure... but that's all secondary to Cory storming in and declaring "Big trouble." He's using his angry-anxiousy voice, you'll know what I mean if you hear it, it's always hilarious. This is some high quality stuff from Cory.

The scene moves to the living room after Feeny and Bolander leave, where we learn that Cory is taking every precaution possible for the meeting with Topanga's parents. After the events in "Long Walk to Pittsburgh" and him keeping Topanga from going to Yale, Cory is understandably worried that her parents hate him. To mitigate as much damage as possible, he's prepared index cards of Do's and Don't's for his own parents to follow, including no impressions from Alan, and no singing from Amy.


I don't think we've seen Topanga's mother before, but that's definitely not Peter Tork, who played Jedediah several times in earlier seasons. Now we've got Anette O'Toole as Rhiannon Lawrence, who I only know as Clark Kent's mother on Smallville, and Michael McKean as Jed, who played the lead singer of fictional-but-now-sort-of-also-real band Spinal Tap in This is Spinal Tap. O'Toole and McKean have proven that sometimes the Irish and Scottish don't hate each other, since they're married in real life.

Meanwhile, Eric finds Shawn at The Union, and Shawn offers a listening ear for Eric's troubles, adding "... can we do that..?", which made me laugh. They take it one step further by reminding us that they lived together for a whole year and still never really got close. It's always nice when the show laughs at itself. So Eric explains that he's lost everything: his home, Rachel, Jack, and now Feeny. He doesn't mention Tommy though, which I think is a wasted opportunity. Shawn suggests that perhaps Eric was more in love with the competition with Jack than Rachel, which seems to strike a chord.



Fortunately, Shawn Hunter is here to dispense the fortune cookie enlightenment he obtained during his road trip. It doesn't really resonate with Eric, but he appreciates the sentiment, and resolves to search for his own fortune cookie enlightenment. On the other hand, as is the way of this show, the content is less important than the sentiment. I do like the idea of Eric and Shawn buddying up, and their chemistry is obvious right away.

At home, the four parents are socializing in the living room while Cory and Topanga spy on them from the kitchen.


This is fucking ridiculous. Who does this! On principle alone you shouldn't be comparing your potential marriage to anyone else's marriage, let alone using someone else's success as the driving force for your own. It's just so stupid, but I don't need to sit here harping about it since Cory's gonna do that for us soon enough.

The parents have some playful argument about television shows, and Alan ends up doing a terrible impression of Johnny Carson, directly against the rules on Cory's index cards. Jedediah starts a hushed argument with Rhiannon about some nonsense, making everyone feel awkward, and showing the viewer that this marriage may not be as stable as Topanga thinks. Baby Joshua cries, perhaps as a result of the hushed argument, it's hard to say, so Amy sings him a lullaby, another strike against Cory's rules. Alan mumbles out another bad impression, the third strike, prompting one of my all-time favorite Cory lines.


The family portrait above the fireplace there caught my eye, and I noticed that it's an updated portrait with Lindsay Ridgeway as Morgan, so I did a little investigating. The portrait from season 1 with Lily Nicksay lasts all the way through season 3, which is interesting since Ridgeway takes over mid season 3 and Nicksay is not present in season 3 at all. It's not until the beginning of season 4 that a new portrait is above the fireplace, the same one that's still there now. TRIVIA. BOY MEETS WORLD. LOOK AT US. WE'RE HAVING FUN.

Jed steps outside to get some air and to get away from the argument (that he started), and Topanga pulls her mother into the kitchen to talk about what's going on. She says the same "you guys make me confident in my totally-unrelated-to-you relationship", and her mom tries in vain to explain why this is fucking ridiculous. 

At The Apartment, Jack and Rachel are still making out on the couch. That's endurance, folks. Eric shows up to explain what he realized with Shawn earlier, that it was more about the competition and that he was never really in love with Rachel at all.


They've still got the boxes of Popeye's on top of the fridge.

Eric leaves with a weight off his shoulders having reconciled with his friends, but Rachel appears to be shaken by all this talk of Jack and Eric "competing" for her. We don't get much else here, so we'll have to wait to see what comes out of this. Not that we care, right?

In The Living Room, things unravel as all the talk of marriage and happiness causes Rhiannon to break down and admit that her and Jedediah have fallen out of love, and it's clear that they're going to divorce, if they haven't already. There's one exchange in particular that's always stuck with me.


So Topanga runs off in a very Shawn Hunter-esque fashion.

We fade over to Feeny's wedding, located in scenic The Living Room. But hey, it's free. Shawn and Angela arrive together and have a fun little conversation. It's really well placed and well timed. This is the season finale and these two have had some real turbulence this season! So this dialogue serves to round everything out and leaves us with a nice and comfortable feeling about their friendship. I like it. But it's completely forgotten when the camera moves across the room and shows us that Eric is Mister Feeny's best man. Ahhhhhhh that's so sweeeeeeeeeettttttt.


This is the second time they've had that exchange, and I want to point out again that Feeny is hesitant to say he loves Shawn, Cory, and Topanga in the future, so this relationship really is something special. Gets me every time.

They talk a little more about how Eric's thinking of doing some traveling, and it's implied that he won't be here when Feeny gets back from his honeymoon, and that perhaps they may not see each other again. It'd make me SUPER nervous if I didn't already know that Eric is right there in the first episode of season 7. I'm watching it now, and yeah, there's no mention of Eric's traveling at all.

The procession begins, so Feeny and Bolander begin to exchange vows, and they're pretty well written. I'm a fan. Topanga spends the whole time sobbing in the audience because today is all about her. She doesn't even clap after "you may kiss the bride".


Maybe I'm being too hard on her, but... Mmmmmm I really don't think I am. Her parents are there watching the wedding too, but I can't imagine why.

So Feeny's officially married. Cory gets a phone call from the wedding hall and he tells them that that date that opened up (mentioned at the beginning of the episode) isn't going to work. It's just music and the logo during the credits, so that's the end of season six!

Plot: 0.5 - Eric was good. But the fuckin... MY PARENTS ARE MARRIED SO WE'RE GONNA BE MARRIED FOREVERRRRRRRRRRRR... Ughhhhhhhhhghghghghhhhhhh.

Character Development: 1.0 - Despite her thoroughly flawed logic, Topanga is suddenly afraid of getting married, which is significant for a while. Eric reached a resolution with Jack and Rachel, Shawn and Angela are in a good place, and Feeny got married! Good shit.

Humor: 1.0 - Cory was really solid. What the hell are you doing?!

Life Lesson: 0 - Topanga is usually intelligent, practical, and logical. There was none of that today. For fuck's sake, Shawn's dad died, but did that make him think life was a waste of time? No! It did the opposite! Shawn has a new sense of purpose and a desire to make the most out of life while he can (what I called "fortune cookie enlightenment" earlier). Good for Shawn! Similarly, you might think that Topanga would want to cherish her love with Cory for however long it lasts, but she decides instead to figure the whole thing is a waste of time and just fall to pieces. This is not the strong Topanga I've praised in the past. This is a stupid plot device and I don't like it.

2.5 out of 4.0. - The Matthews Bruthas make this worth watching, but it's still a close call. And it sets up the plot for the first five or so episodes of season 7, so if you're playing along, this episode is fairly necessary.

Thanks for sticking with me for another season. We've had a lot of lows, but also some really high highs. Rachel somehow became more of a centerpiece than Angela by the end. I've mentioned a couple times that Angela draws all of her lines from Shawn, but now that I think about it, is Rachel ever in a scene without either Jack or Eric? Not very often, that's for sure. I'm rambling, let's just close it out.



My post-season break lined up nicely with the week of Christmas, so I'll see you guys again on the 29th. If you're in the Christmas spirit, I recommend, as always, Santa's Little Helper from season 1, Turnaround from season 2, and Santa's Little Helpers here in season 6. One step further, I recommend The Muppet Christmas Carol and the Sam Adams Winter Lager.

Again, I am eternally grateful for your support. I love talking about this show with you. All the best!







35 comments :

  1. Awesome review as always. The first half dozen episodes of Season Seven though...ugh...

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    1. Thanks! It's gonna be rough. I'm glad everyone is in agreement that Topanga is a lunatic, that will make it easier to write about XD

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  2. McKean and O'Toole are married in real life. McKean's always plays a cynical, bitter, sarcastic character so I really enjoy when he shows up on a TV show or movie. They were probably the best parents since they had real chemistry to fall back on. Yeah, I don't know why they got invited to the wedding.

    Do I like this episode? I don't skip it, I watch it all the way through. Topanga does get ridiculous. I guess it's her way of dealing with marrying young in the way Cory has those nightmares. Eh. Rachel really had no scenes alone with Topanga and Angela this season. Always with either Jack or Eric. Makes it funny she was a bridesmaid considering how little she was in contact with them.

    I wonder how Nebula feels about the divorce and not being a bridesmaid at her sister's wedding.

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    1. Poor Nebby. Also I just realized this, so I guess I'll say it to you, in the past Topanga always referred to her parents by name, but she spends this entire episode calling them mommy and daddy. That's a little frustrating.

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    2. I feel like there's a story behind their transformation. Like Jed and Rhiannon kept being hippies through the 80s and early 90s in an effort to stay in the mindset of when they first fell in love. Sorta mask that they weren't anymore. Instead of forcing Topanga back to Pittsburgh, they let her stay to see if they can work it out as just normal people.

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    3. Heh, yeah, and then they dye their hair after the divorce to help move on.

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    4. "I wonder how Nebula feels about the divorce and not being a bridesmaid at her sister's wedding."
      ^ nebula no longer exists.
      & RETCONS! She no longer calls them by their first names .. which, in season 1, she called them Jedediah and Chloe. Where's Chloe, Rhiannon?

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  3. The first few episodes of seaso 7 confirm my viewpoint that Cory should have stayed with Lauren. Those episoes really cemented my dislike for her a a character. Cory should have told her to shove it when she suddenly wanted him back again.

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    1. I agree that he should just move on with some one else, topangas been jerking him around for way too long, but lauren wouldn't make sense. She lives up in the mountains. I never really understood how she thought it might work for her and cory.

      If i was cory i'd call up that redhead from disney world, she seemed into him.

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    2. Pretty much ANYONE from Cory's past. Call up TK imo.

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  4. This is by far the most frustrating segment of the show. Cory is really funny here, but this Topanga shit is unbearable. Her behavior here is unprecedented and ridiculous and it only gets worse from her--she is AWFUL at the beginning of next season. Annette O'toole is neat I guess but this is my least favorite Topanga Dad, he's just annoying. I really, really hate the whole "Topanga's parents divorce" storyline. Also Feeny getting married in the Matthews living room is fucking bizarre.

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    1. Yeah, by far. I'm glad everyone in the comments is in agreement about that, it makes it much easier to write about. I watched the first couple episodes of season 7 and she is INFURIATING. And yeah, the first Jed was by far the best as the only one who seemed like a hippie.

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  5. Yeah, Topanga is now nuts and she takes Angela along with her! Also, yes, Martha Kent! Next incarnation and the final one for Topanga's mom is Bree Vandercamp! And her Dad changes as well. Its like, the show forgets they're supposed to be hippies. Anyway, like I was saying Topanga becomes sort of nuts, because her parents get divorced. Which is terrible but the way she takes it, you would think she wasn't 18/19, you would think she was a child.

    But seriously, start doing your reviews later on in the day, so you can possibly have a drink or something. Good luck. We will be there with you!

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    1. Yeah I watched 7x01 in the process of writing it, I had forgotten that they recast her parents AGAIN. The original Jed was by far the best because he had that hippie vibe, like you were saying. He just seemed like some angry businessman in this episode. And yeah, a divorce is awful, but this is fucking ridiculous.

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  6. The Scots and the Irish don't hate each other. They just hate the English. (speaking as a Scot).

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    1. Oh, I thought it was a threesome of hatred. And then there's the Welsh, I don't think anybody likes them either

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  7. Anyone else feel that Feeny's wedding felt really sudden? He's my favorite character in the show and I feel he deserved something a little less...anticlimactic. We've seen him pursue the Dean in one prior episode (a couple weeks ago) but their relationship doesn't really feel developed at all, and suddenly they're getting married out of the blue. The Eric moment is nice, but the whole thing doesn't have nearly the weight it should have to me. For instance, his subplot in B&B's B&B was much more affecting to me than any of this Boleander stuff. It's cute that they're married in real life, but there's hardly any on-screen chemistry there between the characters.

    And yes, the less said about Topanga, the better. Next season's premiere is a strong contender for "worst episode ever!" That and the dumb drag episode with Eric and Jack that's the poor man's Chick Like Me. Oh, and the boys fighting the girls for the apartment with the wrestler, and...just, a good chunk of that season, actually. I'm not much of a fan of S6, but S7 really falls apart. Eric's character goes further down the toilet.

    Anyway, thanks for reviewing these, and I'm looking forward to some lambasting of the show's final year! (I did like the series finale, though, and Seven the Hard Way has its moments)

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    1. Yeah, I constantly forget that Feeny's marriage happens. The only part of his deanlationship that is at all memorable is "Bee True," and that's just because Cory and Shawn are so funny. Mankind forever, sounds like you need to meet Mr. Socko.

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    2. Haha, "poor man's chick like me", that is the perfect description. And you're right, Feenlander is underwhelming. He deserved something much grander.

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    3. I was wondering if I'd accidentally skipped a whole bunch of reviews, because I was sure Feeny and the dean just started dating a few episodes ago! How are they getting married already??

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  8. Great job on these reviews dude. I've been enjoing them since the beginning. I'm actually kinda sad it's almost over. Merry Christmas! Thanks for doing these.

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  9. "I wonder how Nebula feels about the divorce and not being a bridesmaid at her sister's wedding."

    Nebula was probably off trying to stop a war somewhere. Given the current state of the world, she obviously failed so I wouldn't count on her showing up on GMW.

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    1. New spinoff idea, where Jack and Rachel meet Nebula in the Peace Corps after season 7

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  10. In an interview Rider did he mentioned how he and Will had so few scenes together because they couldn't keep a straight face. Maybe I'm just reading into it, but it looks like Rider is trying to cover up a laugh in the gif you posted with them together.

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  11. "Marriage is not something you just get through"

    ...Is the reason you're getting divorced. If your marriage is based on being FOREVER IN LOVE, then a rough patch is, of course, going to end it. You have to GET THROUGH THEM.

    ("How I Met Your Mother" did a similar plotline with Barney's brother. It was just as stupid there, like the rest of that horrifically awful season.)

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    1. Agree. Getting through things is absolutely part of marriage.

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    2. Yes and no. You get through rough patches, but if it's all rough, then it's time to consider that getting through it might not be the best solution. I think it's pretty clear what she meant by it.

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  12. McKean is also Chuck from Better Call Saul. Lol

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  13. I don't think Topanga is being selfish by sobbing at the wedding over her parents and her impending marriage.

    God, y'all are such Topanga haters. Especially you, Sean…

    She just found out that her parents are basically gonna split up on the day she was apparently going to share that she and Cory picked a wedding date. That obviously blindsided her too. Then, she's at a wedding, which can make anyone reflect on their own romance or any romance they may have idolized (whether that's healthy or not). It's a lot to deal with. I think her sobbing like that and looking on at her parents is valid.

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    1. Completely agree, but I think her behavior before she found out about the divorce ("we'll be okay because they're okay") makes no sense and is just a lazy way to set up the following plotline.

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    2. Sorry but she could have tried to hold back her display of grief a BIT, out of respect for the ceremony. Sure she's entitled to be sad, yeah she can shed a tear or two (which many do at weddings anyway), and perhaps excuse herself to go to the restroom if she really needed to cry it out some. Otherwise, she could've TRIED to pull herself together for the moment. She would be free to cry her eyes out all she wanted after it was over. It was really was symptomatic of her overall behavior, going into subsequent episodes, with regards to her overdramatic, self-absorbed immaturity. Divorce is very sad, yes, but at the same time it wasn't going to exactly be the end of her life. Especially at her age and being out on her own at that point (at least she got an entire childhood with happily married parents, unlike sadly too many of her generation and younger don't get to enjoy).

      Then of course there's the fact that she had no good reason for taking the divorce out on her fiancee, almost punishing him for it like if it was in anyway his fault. That was not only petulant, but heartless.

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