Episode 6x01 "His Answer (Part 1)"

Is that a new logo? Can't tell? Well I don't blame you, because the new intro is almost exactly the same as the last one. Except for the shots including that new redhead there, I had to go back to season 5 to make sure they weren't re-using footage. The song, though, has certainly not changed, which is perhaps the biggest mistake of all. Maybe they thought it was cute to make it so entirely similar to the last intro. But it's not.

It's dumb.

We get a quick recap of the developments near the end of Season 5. Amy got pregnant, Feeny decided to retire, everyone graduated, and Topanga proposed. In the present, Cory's unsure how to respond to this ambush-proposal, which is the most rational thing about the situation. He agrees after she kisses him though, so there we go, that's "his answer", why do we need a part 2? Either way, Topanga wants go tie the knot right away. Why wait when you've been together your whole lives?

Damn you Karen McCain, for getting in the way of my gif. And wow, that's a low blow from Cory. I don't even know what's real anymore, to be honest. I thought we established that Eric convinced Cory girls were icky for a few years, and then they started dating again in high school. But I think from now on they'll be insisting that they've never been apart, so consider this my blanket statement of "this is a BS retcon" for the rest of the series. Between my posts and the comments we've all harped on it enough. Let's just accept our fate and be done with it.

This scene jumps back and forth from The Apartment to what must be Angela's room, which we've never seen before, where she and Topanga are similarly talking about the marriage situation. Shawn, as we know, buys into The Retcon and thus supports the marriage, while Angela, surprisingly enough, thinks they should be doing pretty much everything in the world except getting married. We learn that Cory is afraid to tell his parents about the proposal, but not much else. It's mostly just to show us Shawn and Angela reacting to the news. 

But Shawn's got news of his own.

Cory's lack of enthusiasm is due to his preoccupation with GETTING MARRIED, but that still deserves a "what the hell?" Shawn's going or not-going to Pennbrook was one of the most significant issues at the end of last season. It was a really big deal, and it was starting to look like he actually wouldn't go. But now it's just swept under the rug with a "I decided to go." He does mention his photography job though, so they're at least attempting some sort of continuity. Underwhelming, to say the least. Jack is more excited about it than anyone else, but he and Eric are alarmed to learn that Shawn will be living in a dorm with Cory instead of in The Apartment. How ever will they find a replacement? 

Well since this is a sitcom, all they've gotta do is wait about ten seconds, same way we found Jack at the beginning of season 5. The redhead from the new intro loudly breaks up with her boyfriend at the end of the hallway and is quickly recruited by our boys to be their new roommate. A few hours later, Shawn's not happy to find all his stuff being thrown out into the hallway, but quickly changes his mind at the sight of the new fiery haired roommate.

You kinda have to hear it, but the way Shawn does that line gets me in stitches every time.

So yeah. Welcome to the new Apartment Dynamic. The new girl, Rachel, is very good looking. That's her thing. For two seasons. The amount of shenanigans resulting solely from the fact that she's good looking is just absurd. I am not looking forward to it. "Rachel is pretty, and thus ___ occurs." Eric and Jack were really starting to find their footing as a team, but any hope we had is gone now. For the most part, anyway.

Shangela and Corpanga arrive at the Matthew House after a double date, and things start to unravel. It comes up that Shawn and Cory will live together, but Topanga expected to live with Cory since they'd be married, but no one can mention the marriage in front of Cory's parents, so it's a whole sitcommy mess. Eric shows up just then, expertly breaking the tension as always.

I love everyone else's expressions there.

Topanga eventually just says flat out that they're getting married. Amy, Alan, and Angela, The A Team, serve as the force of reason here, saying all the things that we the viewers want to say about why this marriage is such a bad idea. Shawn's purpose is to remind everyone (including us) that Cory and Topanga are exceptions to the natural way of things, and Eric doesn't say anything at all. Probably because he's too busy thinking about, I don't know, kangaroos, or Mister Feeny, or his new roommate. The situation heats up, and ultimately Corpanga run off to elope.

Once they're gone, Eric comes out in support of their marriage, but his reasons are total nonsense.

That's another one where the delivery is important. It's hard to explain why this is different from when Jack does those kinds of insult-jokes, which I generally don't enjoy, it must have to do with the fact that Alan is a better established character and actually knows Eric a lot better than Jack does.

Corpsehanger arrive at some judge's house to elope, and it's clear that everyone's kinda starting to question this whole thing. It's completely obvious to everyone on earth that they're going to wait and have a real ceremony, because it's television, so I'm really not interested in jumping through these hoops. 

At The Apartment, Jack and Rachel find their way into some play-wrestling, just as Eric comes home.

There are some more jokes about how Rachel is good looking before Eric explains the crisis he "resolved" back at home. And then some more jokes about Rachel, it's honestly kind of unsettling, the red flags ought to be going off in her head right now, but instead she says that they're terrific and are making her realize what a creep her now-ex-boyfriend was. Like, this would be fine if they were old pals, I can totally understand that kind of humor, but they literally just met her earlier today, and now they're both blatantly competing to get in her pants. Maybe she's just used to this sort of thing, I have no idea.

If I were to give her character a lot of credit, I would say that that's a clever way of passively shutting down their boners. Buuuuuuut it's probably just a cheap "haw haw they aren't gonna get laid" reversal joke. Whatever.

We jump back to the judge's house for the wedding ceremony. Cory says "I do" but Topanga finds herself unable to get the words out, and it fades to the credits, which is just some jammin' guitar music over the logo. Real talk, I love all of the music that plays during the credits like this. Maybe it's all nostalgia, but it always sounds like a bright sunshiney afternoon. 

And oh, I get it now, the next episode is called "Her Answer (Part 2)", because now she's gotta answer the "Do you take Cory..." question. Cute.

Plot: 0.25 - Nothing really happened. We barely addressed Shawn going to college, Rachel was introduced in the LAZIEST WAY IMAGINABLE, and the whole eloping thing just feels unnecessary.

Character Development: 0.5 - Rachel is developed in the sense that she comes into existence, but that's about it. Again, very lazy writing when it comes to Rachel. 

Humor: 1.0 - Eric does a lot of good work, Cory too for the first half. And Shawn is consistent throughout. 

Life Lesson: 0 - It's really unclear how we're supposed to view this eloping. Everyone sort of comes to terms with it by the end, except then Topanga suddenly doesn't like it anymore. Also it's totally cool to be a massive creep toward your new roommate. 

1.75 out of 4.0. - Definitely the weakest season opener so far. We had such a great setup at the end of season 5, but this was a letdown. The two biggest points are that we didn't explore Shawn choosing to go to college, and that Rachel's entire presentation this episode seems like it was written by a 14 year old boy. Seasons 4 and 5 had such strong openings, showing us everything to look forward to, but what the hell do we have to look forward to now?

Thanks for reading, see you Wednesday. 

All images used under Fair Use.