Episode 6x14 "Getting Hitched"

I watched episode 14 of Girl Meets World, and I couldn't even finish it. I got near the end, but as soon as Riley and Maya turned on that video of Lucas's friends? I had to turn that shit right off. The feel-good-ness is so oppressively heavy handed, I couldn't stand it. 

Episode 15 was marginally better, but still oppressively mushy toward the end. I lost count of how many times the audience went "awwww" by the end of it.

Only a few more days until the episode with Shawn, hopefully that doesn't disappoint.

The first minute and a half shows us what happened in the previous episode, but thankfully the episode itself kicks off with a much more lighthearted tone. Topanga surprises her boyfriend at The Union with her recent purchase of "The Fiancee Game". They need a couple to play against, and Eric and Rachel conveniently arrive just in time. As I'm sure you all know, you can't play The Fiancee Game without an official moderator, so Eric recruits a nearby Mister Feeny, who is surprisingly eager to participate.

 Before the hot, steamy action of The Fiancee Game can begin, it cuts over to The Dorm, where Shawn Hunter is sullenly stacking soda cans into a lovely pyramid, which is obviously a metaphor for stacking sadness into a pyramid of having a dead dad. Something like that, anyway.

Jack shows up and wants his little brother to head down to the old trailer with him and sort through the old man's stuff. The whole dead-dad/broken-heart thing has multiplied Shawn's normal angst levels by a factor of about 17.3, so he wants Jack to just throw all that old shit away, cuz he ain't goin back. 

Back at The Union, Cory and Topanga are having a very bad time in the Fiancee Game. Cory's answered every question wrong, and presumably so has Topanga. Eric and Rachel are rocking out though, including Rachel knowing that Eric's favorite fish is "penguin". Feeny can see that Topanga's getting upset so he ends the game and Rachel heads home, but Eric's getting relationshippy thoughts as a result of his success in the game. So that will surely come up later, which I'm not excited about. This scene, though, has been one of the very few where Racheric were actually fun to watch.

Topanga decides that the only reasonable solution to this problem is for her and Cory to move in together. 

It's amazing to me that she can be ready to live with him, and still not ready to have sex with him. I feel like the natural order is sex -> live together -> get engaged, yet they're proceeding in the reverse order. 

Chet's old trailer is pretty messy, leaving Jack without any idea where to start. It takes about five seconds for Shawn to show up. He hugs it out with his brother and starts to have a look around. I really don't understand where this total change of heart came from, but it moves the plot along. Shawn seems unusually excited to find his dad's lighter, and stashes it in his pocket without saying anything, so that should be significant later. Most important, though, is when he finds a letter from Jack's stepfather, telling Chet not to worry about paying him back. Turns out, Shawn's tuition money was coming from Jack's stepdad! Dun dun dunnnn. That's actually a fantastic bit of detail that I never saw coming when I first watched the series. I fully expected them to just sweep it under the rug. On the other hand, Jack said he was paying for college with student loans, so I'm not sure why his stepdad would pay for Shawn but not Jack. Probably just an oversight.

I wonder if it's deliberate when Jack says "your father" instead of "our father".

Eric arrives at The Dorm, where Cory is eagerly waiting for Topanga in his expensive new silk pajamas. Eric's looking for advice about what to do with Rachel. He mentions the "unspoken competition" between him and Jack, which, pfff, come on, unspoken? But Cory doesn't give a shit since he thinks he's gonna get laid tonight. And frankly, that's a reasonable assumption. Cory finally gets him out the door, but not before Topanga arrives with a bag full of her stuff, since she's moving in or whatever. Eric asks her "Oooh what'd you bring, toys?", and see this is an interesting line. If you're young, and you think Eric is merely displaying his innocence as he thinks Topanga would come over to play with toys, then sure, that's chuckle worthy. But if you're an adult, and you think that Eric has picked up on the presumed sexual nature of this encounter, due to Cory's pajamas and sheets and behavior, then that line takes on a very different, and awkward, meaning. I don't know how they got away with that. Surely they were going for the first option, but it's way too close to the line.

Doesn't matter anyway cuz Topanga ain't here to sin. She just wants to have a normal, sex-free living-together situation.

Back at the trailer, Shawn's raving about how he doesn't want to be a charity case for Jack's family. Let's travel back in time to my review of Season 1 Episode 10, and I quote, "Indeed, it's not that Shawn hates charity, he hates pity. He hates self righteous people thinking that he needs help. But in this case Cory didn't help Shawn because Shawn needs help, he helped Shawn because they're friends." How fucking spot on was that shit? That has been consistent through the whole series, and we're seeing it now in this episode. This time, replace "Cory" with "Jack", and "friends" with "family", and Shawn is once again willing to accept it. 

The trouble isn't over though. Shawn still isn't really willing to help Jack learn about their father, since he thinks it's all shitty stuff that's just gonna make the situation worse. Some sad music plays as we head back to CoTopangary. 

There's a handful of jokes in this scene that are completely based on the fact that Topanga's wearing a green face-cream mask and it looks weird. Okay, serious question, are we ten years old right now? That is some terrible, lazy ass writing. Booooo. Booooooooo.

Eric Kramer's his way into the room again, and nothing worth mentioning happens. When he leaves, he plays with Topanga's face for some reason... It seems like a reference? I have no idea.

He sucks one of his fingers clean as he walks out, which gets the standard "eewww" from the audience, but just as they finish their group expression, some guy yells out "sick!", it's clearly audible in the footage, and he sounds truly disgusted. Honestly the funniest thing to happen today. You should go listen for that, it's hilarious.

Topanga goes to wash off her mask before bed, and Cory... starts praying. He spends like a whole minute asking God to bless various people, which I guess is nice of him? But it's really not very engaging television. Topanga joins the praying and asks God to bless Cory, just before a fade over to The Apartment. 

What in the gosh darn heck was that? Their entire living-together experience has been a disaster so far, and they're continuing to see how much they don't know about each other, but we're supposed to throw all that aside because they prayed for each other? I don't get it at all. What on earth are we supposed to take away from that? It's weird.

Anyway, Jack tries to explain how he's feeling to Rachel, but starts to break down as his emotions overwhelm him. In particular, he's having trouble dealing with the fact that he'll never get to know his real dad, but he has to keep it locked away for Shawn's sake. In the heat of the moment, somebody on the show finally gets to kiss Rachel. And it ain't Eric, much to his disappointment, as he walks in just as things start to heat up.

I'm... actually pretty okay with that. That sort of thing definitely happens in real life, and I like how they made it a curveball by making us think Eric was gonna make something happen.

In the final scene, Cory shows up at the trailer and informs Shawn that he is in fact still a virgin, much to his disappointment. Shawn thinks it's a good time to "get outta here", and wants to hit the road with the trailer. He invites Cory along, which Cory accepts, and that's about it. I can't claim to fully understand how trailers work, but there has always been a hallway on the back wall leading to the bedrooms, and now that's just not there anymore.

Plot: 0.75 - Yeah it's fine. The Cory story was fun comic relief except for when he started praying... Jack and Shawn were sort of connected but also independent, and Rachel was interesting for probably the first time ever.

Character Development: 1.0 - Eric finds that he has feelings for Rachel beyond the superficial, but she's currently got her tongue in Jack's mouth. Cory and Topanga realize that they don't know each other as well as they thought, and maybe they're not ready to live together. Shawn wants to head out on his own. That's some good shit all around.

Humor: 1.0 - Honestly I'm just giving it for the guy who yelled "Sick!". Seriously, you should go listen to that.

Life Lesson: 0.5 - Living with your SO is harder than you might think.

3.25 out of 4.0. It's actually a pretty good episode. I expected much worse. And the title is pretty clever, like hitched for Cory and Topanga and their living together, and also Shawn hitching up his trailer for the road. I think I've covered everything I want to say.

Thanks for reading, see you Wednesday!

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