Wednesday, April 9, 2014

Episode 3x14 "A Kiss is More Than a Kiss"


Sooooooooooooooooooooooooo Cory and Topanga are still interacting with each other even though they broke up a couple episodes ago. Shawn does not approve, but Cory insists that it's completely innocent. Further, he insists that participating the "Fall Fashion-Wear Fest" with Topanga is also innocent, since he agreed to do it back when they were still dating. This event apparently consists of students modeling formal-wear for the prom. They say and react to that explanation like it actually makes sense, like "oh, of course, modeling outfits for the prom, that's a thing." Also Topanga's hair is way too long.


Cory wants to prove that he's over Topanga, so he agrees to go on a double date with Shawn. Shawn recruits the first two girls who happened to walk by, and they agree because he's Shawn goddamn Hunter, and it helps that Cory's actually starting to not look like a 9 year old anymore.

On the Matthews' backyard patio, Eric opens the response to his application to Penn State. He reads the rejection out loud and Mr. Feeny overhears and offers some sincere advice.


Ain't that beautiful? I'm concerned by the timeline here, I don't know what college still has applications open by the time rejections/acceptances start goin out, but we'll just have to put up with Hollywood on that one.

And then something TERRIBLE happens! Muhhuahauahahauahha *lightning*

Inside, Eric and Mrs. Matthews are prying into Cory for more information about his date that night, and then Cory makes a pretty meta comment about how Morgan never tries to get into his personal life, Morgan hasn't bothered him for a long time. And then Morgan comes downstairs and we meet the new actress who I guess is better, but fuck, that's like replacing M. Night Shyamalan with Michael Bay as director of Last Airbender and saying "yeah I mean... it's technically better, but... it's really just less bad."


She's looking into the camera while she gives these lines. Is she looking at me? I don't want her looking at me. I don't want some tongue in cheek fourth-wall breaking shit here, just say your lines and let's move on.

Wow, this shit, this the Eli treatment right here. This is almost the exact same formula as the scene where we saw Eli for the first time. Joke after joke after joke from the new cast member while the audience loses their minds. But right off the bat we can tell what we're in for for the rest of the series. She's gonna be snarkin it up at the expense of her brothers, no real character development, no arcs, no depth, just wisecracks. I honestly have no problem with a little sister being on this show, and this new actress is perfectly fine, I just hate how she's written. Blugh.

Fuck, I'm only four minutes in and it's been an hour. Long way to go. I need a drink.

WHAT THE SHIT they made ANOTHER joke about Morgan being in her room for a long time? That's TWO in like a minute, come ooooooooooooooooooon. 


Heh heh heh... I love making those...

Her mom finally gets her the fuck outta there so Eric and Cory can talk, and his best advice is to not talk about Topanga at all on the date. At Chubbie's later, Shawn and his date are vigorously making out on their side of the booth while Cory makes awkward small talk. He even got the cuter of the two, he's definitely still hung up on Toperoski.



That line is absolutely timeless. Cracks me up every time. His delivery is amazing. We jump ahead to Cory and his date (her name is Melissa) on Melissa's doorstep but he just doesn't seem to have the nerve to kiss her goodnight, even though she explicitly states that she wants him to.

At the school's lunch the next day, Eric goes to Eli, Turner, and Feeny to show them his acceptance letter from "Boris College", and they try not to tell him directly to his face that Boris doesn't exist. 

Across the lunchroom are Cory and Shawn. Apparently Cory gave Melissa a handshake the night before instead of kissing her, but evidently she found that gentlemanly and approaches Cory asking him for another date. Afterwards, Cory is still unable to kiss her, and invites himself in to meet her parents.


Cory admits that he's not over Topanga, and insists that she's not over him either. But then he turns around to see her kissing some Brad at one of the booths there at Chubbie's. That's some real shit right there, folks. Real as FUCK. I'm sure most of us have been in this position before, and it SUCKS. I'm wary of some sort of Disney movie ending to all this, but it is Boy Meets World after all, so I expect something more meaningful.

And indeed, back at Shawn/Turner's apartment, Shawn gives a very well delivered, impassioned speech about how Topanga's doing exactly what she's supposed to be doing: she's met someone new, she's moving on, just like Cory is supposed to. Hell to the hell yes. I've said it before, but most of the best episodes of this show are about dating. It's by far the most realistic and mature examination of teenage I have ever seen on television. Anyway Cory storms over to Melissa's house to throw down some moves (not entirely realistic but shut up).


That's awesome too! "Well we tried, oh well, peace out." I love this show.

The Brad surfer dude guy is hangin out at Topanga's locker the next day and Cory jumps on his back in a blind rage. He bails and Topanga's like "what the fuck dude", but she also understands why it's hard for him to see that stuff. They argue, and it ends with Cory saying he doesn't want to be friends anymore. Harsh.

At lunch, Feeny finally decides to tell Eric that Boris College doesn't exist. Eric had already figured out it was a scam, and just went on pretending because he wanted to be a part of the good time that everyone around him was having. Like all of the conversations between these two, it's genuinely sentimental and well written. And funny.


At home, Cory throws all the stuff he has left over from his relationship with Topanga into the family's trash compactor, and his parents come downstairs in response to the noise. They give him the same sort of talk Shawn gave him earlier about dating other people.


Out of everything I learned from this show, that line is one of the ones that hit me the hardest. Obviously I'm not in high school anymore, but that shit hit me like a freight train when I was younger. It's brilliant. That's precisely the kind of thing teenagers need to hear. Nowadays everybody is searchin for their goddamned soul mate in English class instead of finding out what kind of people they're compatible with. Rock on, Boy Meets World. A round of applause, please, for Alan Matthews, partly in remembrance of times long past, when he gave us this kind of wisdom on a much more consistent basis.

They go on to say that even if Cory and Topanga are right for each other, then dating other people will still serve to confirm that, and that it's a good idea to not completely throw away their friendship in the meanwhile. This episode, you guys. It's just a BARRAGE of life lessons today. I love this show.

Back at school later that night, it's time for the Prom Fashion Fest. Turner remarks "Parents, if you see anything you want for your kids, there's order forms in the back." Okay fine, that actually does make a decent amount of sense. Anyway Cory shows up in time, and he and Topanga hash things out and Cory agrees to stop bein a dick.


During the credits Mr. Feeny finally brings Eric a letter of recommendation and tells Eric to go ahead and read it.


Go ahead, grab a tissue. I'll wait.

I love that scene. You know, some people don't really get this show, and this is one of those scenes that'll completely divide a room based on who gets this show and who doesn't. Some people are like "oh Feeny's just a teacher on a TV show." NO. NO HE IS NOT. Mr. Feeny is the essence of having someone who believes in you. We saw it earlier this season with Shawn, and now Eric's getting the same treatment. We loved him in the first two seasons, but this season is really showing us what an amazing person George Feeny really is.

Plot: 1.0 - Boris College was a little silly, but I liked everything else.

Character Development: 1.0 - F-F-F-F-F-F-Feeny. And Cory and Topanga.

Humor: 1.0 - It's the reason we came out of the trees, man.

Life Lesson: 1.0 - "You're supposed to date around, that's how you find the right person." And all associated bits of wisdom. I covered most of them already.

4.0 out of 4.0. This episode kicks ass by dealing with a very real teenage problem. Two actually. Eric's college admissions struggle is also very real. The resolution of Cory's story wasn't the Disney movie I was afraid of, we got to see Alan for the first time in a while, and the Feeny/Eric relationship hit one of its best moments. The craziest part is that as soon as Morgan came back, it got a perfect score. What's that about.


As an aside, I'm going to retroactively give City Slackers a 4.0. I don't know what I was thinking when I wrote that conclusion, it was at least as good as this one. 

Thanks for reading, see you Friday for one of my personal favorite episodes!

All images used under Fair Use.

4 comments :

  1. There are fashion shows, atleast at m school, where people modeled for the prom.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Oh yeah? I'm like 0 for 20 on my "I don't think this is a real thing" moments.

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  2. Topangas hair was never, and will never be too long.

    ReplyDelete